


The Adventures of Jedi turned Space Pirates

by NikkiRouse



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: F/F, F/M, Great-great-great-grandpa Yoda, M/M, Sad Obi-Wan Kenobi, Space Pirate Obi-Wan, Uncle Hondo, Uncle Obi-Wan Kenobi, Yoda wears an eye-patch, pirate daycare
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-15
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:27:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26484139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NikkiRouse/pseuds/NikkiRouse
Summary: (I accidentally Orphaned the original fic)Obi-Wan takes Luke and Leia with him instead of giving them to anyone. But, he realizes that he needs a way to make money to feed them, so he’s walking around a cantina on some shady planet with a baby in each arm looking for work and he ends up running into Hando. And Hondo sees the kids and starts making jokes about using protection while Obi-Wan is too tired for this and it’s written all over his face. After a while, Hondo notices how tired and thin Obi looks and asks if he is ok which Obi then goes on a rant about how he has no money and can't find a job and how he needs to feed the kids but he has nothing. And Hondo claps him on the shoulder and proceeds to give him a job. And that's how Obi-Wan, Luke, and Leia ended up becoming the most feared and loved space pirates in the galaxy.
Relationships: Boba Fett/Luke Skywalker, CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi, CT-7567 | Rex & Luke Skywalker, Hondo Ohnaka & Luke Skywalker, Leia Organa & Luke Skywalker, Leia Organa & Luke Skywalker & Han Solo, Leia Organa/Han Solo, Luke Skywalker & Han Solo, Luke Skywalker & Yoda, Obi-Wan Kenobi & CT-7567 | Rex, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Hondo Ohnaka, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Yoda
Comments: 17
Kudos: 212





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I am so sorry I accidentally orphaned my fic.

Obi-Wan did not know what possessed him to take the twins with him instead of giving Leia to the Organas and Luke to the Lars family, as the plan Yoda and him had originally come up with. But he did know he was starting to regret it, due to the lack of sleep caused by the twins crying every night. He also knew he ran out of credits paying for baby formula and diapers for the twins, and he hadn’t eaten anything in three rotations. 

Force, he needed a drink. And a job. Maybe a job, then a drink. Yeah, that made the most sense to his sleep-deprived mind and starved body. But the Force damned, it seemed as if the whole planet had no job openings. There were no jobs at the cantinas, restaurants, or anywhere, it was really pissing him off. He just needed some credits or food. Having both would also be a nice idea.

Obi-Wan continued to walk down the street looking for anywhere that would allow a man with two babies that looked as if he was about to die. To his surprise, it wasn’t that he looked like he was going to die that kept getting him kicked out of places, it was that he had the twins with him. It made no sense that children would be the reason for his treatment while they allowed smugglers, fugitives, and murderers into these places.

Obi-Wan decided he had done enough looking with his eyes, it was time to use the Force to find somewhere kid-friendly. It led him to the dirtiest, filth infested, cantina he had ever seen on _any_ side of the galaxy. As he stood in front of the cantina contemplating whether or not to enter, two Twi’leks and a human came stumbling out and proceeded to throw up in the middle of the street. 

Oh, the Force is a cruel mistress leading him to this uncivilized cantina, but he was taught to listen to the Force. So he checked to make sure the twins were properly tucked beneath his outer robe and walked into the cantina.

It was even worse on the inside. Loud music and laughter filled the air, drunks laid sprawled out across the soiled tile floor, people stumbled over them trying to get to the bar. Sighing, he walked across the dingy tile floor towards the bar, stepping over drunks.

Before he could reach the bar, a familiar Sriluurian accent called out from behind him, “Kenobi!”

“Kriff,” he softly muttered as he turned around.

Standing in front of him was the pirate captain, Hondo Ohnaka, smiling as if he didn’t have a care in the galaxy.

“How have ya been Kenobi? Heard the Jedi are traitors to the empire. I knew you were better than that stuck up act you put on! Traitors, all of you. You make me so proud,” Hondo exclaimed.

“Hello, Hondo. I am doing fine, but I have some business to attend to, so if you would excuse me.”

“Nonsense. You can spare some time for an old friend. I doubt this business is more important than me,” he said, clapping Obi-Wan on the shoulder, dragging him towards a booth full of his crew.

In all honesty, Obi-Wan was not in the mood to have someone ridicule him. But he couldn’t stop Hondo from doing what he wanted, so he would endure it for a few minutes before excusing himself from the pirate’s company.

Sitting down in the booth, he had to readjust his outer robe, so the twins were showing. Thus allowing Hondo to see them, his grin growing wider at the new information presented to him.

“Why Kenobi, didn’t anyone tell you about protection in that temple?” Hondo laughed, “Obviously you needed it. You got twins!”

“Yes, Hondo they taught us about protection in the temple,” Obi-Wan sighed as he grabbed the bridge of his nose.

“They must have been really bad at it if you got twins!”

“I guess we were not as thorough as we had wished to be.”

“No, you weren’t! Now tell me who was the lucky lady, Kenobi?”

“That is none of your concern Hondo.”

“Ah, fine don’t tell Hondo. It’s not like you’re a single man trying to raise children or anything.”

“Don’t remind me,” Obi-Wan groaned, rubbing his face.

Hondo looked Obi-Wan over again, noticing that he looked like death. Obi-Wan did not resemble the humble Jedi Hondo knew during the war. The war took that honorable man and replaced him with the sad, hurting man that sat before him. It was a depressing thought to Hondo. He wanted to see that fire in Kenobi’s eye that he used to have. See that charming smile and hear those sarcastic remarks he always had on hand.

It was time for a serious conversation with this man. Hondo hated having serious conversations. Hondo shooed his men away from the booth and waited until they were out of earshot to confront Obi-Wan.

“You know, Kenobi, you look like bantha poodoo, what is wrong? You can tell Hondo,” Hondo urged.

Obi-Wan’s will power crumbled at those words. All the emotions he had been suppressing came bubbling to the surface, and he couldn’t push them down any longer. His head fell to his chest as a small sob passed his lips.

“They’re all gone, even the younglings. Their men shot them down with no hesitation. We trusted them and they betrayed us!” Obi-Wan sobbed, “The Sith Lord turned one of our own. He slaughtered the younglings, Hondo! Children, Hondo. Children no older than twelve slaughtered because they were Jedi!”

Hondo was not prepared for Obi-Wan to break down as he did, but he sat there, offering the Jedi as much support as he could as he talked.

“I was going to give the twins to different families, but I couldn’t split them up or leave them with people who couldn’t protect them. And now we’re stranded on this Force forsaken planet because we ran out of fuel and credits,” he ran his hand through his copper locks as he exhaled, “How could everything go so wrong, Hondo?”

“I don’t know what to tell you Kenobi. What happened to the Jedi was terrible and wrong, but you lived. And I do not believe they would want you to wallow in self-pity,” Hondo consoled.

“You’re right, I shouldn’t be wallowing, it’s not the Jedi way.”

“Good. Now that we’ve settled that, how about you join my crew? We can keep the children moderately safe and you’ll have a place to stay. What do you say, Kenobi?”

Hondo extended his open hand to the tired Jedi, waiting for him to take it and join him and his men.


	2. Chapter 2

Obi-Wan gazed at the hand presented to him, wondering if this was real or not. Did Hondo really want him to join a pirate crew? The shocking part was that he was considering joining. The offer was the nicest option so far. It would allow him to stay with the younglings at all times, and he knew Hondo and his crew would not try to hurt them, unlike the people on this planet that he didn’t know.

Straightening his shoulders, he shook the offered hand, “I’ll join you, Hondo. Hopefully, this isn’t a mistake.”

“Oh, trust me, Kenobi, this is the best option for you and those little ones. Besides, this is very profitable for all of us. With your light sword and magical Force stuff, we’ll be the best pirates in the galaxy!” cheered Hondo, while sloshing his drink all over the table.

Too tired to correct Hondo, Obi-Wan rolled his eyes, “Don’t make me change my mind, Hondo.”

“Ah, but Kenobi, you already shook on it, and a Jedi doesn’t go back on their word,” Hondo jested.

“Just get me a Corilian brandy, Hondo.”

Two weeks had passed since Obi-Wan and the twins had joined Hondo and his crew. Obi-Wan was very grateful to them for taking in him and the twins, but Force were they stupid at times. Honestly, they had no adult behavior beyond drinking, gambling, and sex. The rest of the time they acted just like younglings. No, no that’s offensive to the younglings, younglings were able to be quiet at times.

Within the time they had joined Hondo, they had robbed four cantinas, sold hundreds of blasters to bounty hunters, and somehow Obi-Wan ended up playing sabacc at a professional level against ruffians. It was a good thing Obi-Wan played sabacc against Master Plo Koon and Master Yoda when he was a youngling. And every time trouble happened Obi-Wan would end up in the middle of it. 

Their behavior was unacceptable, they were pirates, but they should’ve had some decency to not get him in trouble all the time. The worst thing was that they had their own younglings. Obi-Wan didn’t remember Hondo’s crew ever having younglings before. And they just let them run around all over the ships. Obi-Wan had seen four of them running around with blasters without adult supervision and another two near the spice trying to open one of the boxes. He was not comfortable watching them do any of that and that is why he was currently talking to Hondo.

“Hondo, there are twelve younglings on each of the three ships you have and all of them are running around without adult supervision, it’s unacceptable. Someone should be watching them!” Obi-Wan complained.

“Kenobi, they are fine. I ran around unsupervised as a child and I’m fine. Besides, no one can watch them, everyone has their own job to do on the ships. Unless you want to watch them,” Hondo laughed.

Obi-Wan tiredly rubbed his face, annoyed at the Weequay for not taking this seriously, “Hondo, this is a serious matter. These younglings need an adult to tell them right from wrong. Wait, did you say I could watch them?”

“Yes…”

“That’s not a bad idea,” Obi-Wan mumbled stroking his beard thoughtfully.

“Kenobi, you’re not actually thinking of doing this are you?”

“Well the rest of you aren’t going to do anything about them so I should take charge.”

“Where are you going to watch them? In a cargo bay?”

“That’s not a bad idea Hondo. Not a bad idea,” Obi-Wan mumbled, “Thank you for the idea Hondo. I need to start cleaning out one of the cargo bays.”

“Wha… Kenobi?” Hondo sounded so confused as he watched Obi-Wan walk out of the room heading to one of the cargo bays.

Obi-Wan had placed Luke and Leia in a baby hammock he had hung earlier in the cargo bay. He looked around the cargo bay, surveying all the boxes and crates he would have to move to make it child friendly. Luckily he picked one of the less crowded cargo holds to start a créche for pirate younglings. How did Obi-Wan’s life go from saving the galaxy to starting a créche, he did not know, but he was going to do his best.

Obi-Wan decided he would start cleaning up by moving all the boxes to one side of the bay. Closing his eyes Obi-Wan connected to the Force allowing it to guide him to move the boxes to one side. 

About half an hour in, some of the younglings started to wander into the cargo bay to watch the Jedi use the Force and play with the twins. Obi-Wan didn’t mind them watching him and playing with the twins until four of them started to climb on the boxes while he was moving them.

Obi-Wan hadn’t noticed the younglings had started climbing on them when one jumped onto the box he was moving. The shift in weight caused Obi-Wan to momentarily buckle and the box to start falling. He quickly caught the box and set it down next to the rest of the boxes. Once they were set down he rushed over to the youngling.

Kneeling down, Obi-Wan quickly checked over the little Weequay girl to make sure she wasn’t harmed, “Are you okay little one?”

The little girl shook her head staring up at him with wide eyes, “I’m fine mister, really. Ya caught the box.”

“You shouldn’t have been on the box in the first place. Do you know how dangerous that was? What if I hadn’t caught the box in time? You could have been badly hurt,” he calmly scolded the girl.

“Why do ya’ care? Everyone else woulda’ let me do it.”

“I care because you are a youngling . And the others should not let you or any others go around jumping on floating boxes and almost getting yourselves hurt,” He stood up, dusted off his trousers, and helped the youngling to her feet, “What is your name little one?”

“I’m Tex Ey, the most cunning pirate on this ship! And I know who you’re mister, you’re the Jedi Hondo’s friends with, Obi-Wan Kenobi.”

Obi-Wan smiled at her as she stretched out the ‘Kenobi’ like Hondo always does in greeting.

“Well, that is a very fancy title to have at your age, Tex Ey.”

“Yes, it is.”

“Now that we’ve introduced ourselves do you think you and your friends could refrain from climbing on the boxes as I work on moving them?”

She thought for a minute, then straightened and said, “Let me confer with my crew first then we’ll talk.”

She determinedly marched over to the rest of the younglings and motioned them into a huddle. Obi-Wan held back a chuckle as the younglings leaned into each other whispering and motioning to each other, debating whether or not they should comply with the Jedi’s demands.

After a few minutes, they disengaged from each other and Tex marched back to the Jedi with her posse following behind her.

“Tex and her crew have talked about your demands and have decided we will comply with your demands only if ya’ give us sweets.”

Obi-Wan stroked his beard pretending to consider their deal, “Well, I don’t know if we have any on the ship. I could ask Hondo where there could be some if that is what you want.”

The group muttered among themselves for a minute then looked back at Obi-Wan and nodded.

“That will do Mister Jedi. Ya’ can go talk ta’ Hondo on our behalf. We’ll watch the babies for ya’,” Tex waved her hand dismissing him from their presence.

He shook his head, chuckling as he walked off to find Hondo and recount the younglings’ demands to him.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have TexasDreamer01 to thank for bata reading my fic! They are so amazing.

Hondo was sitting on his so-called throne when Obi-Wan came sauntering into the room. He was smiling which made Hondo happy to see, even if the smile was mischievous. Hondo raised his stein in Kenobi’s direction.

“Kenobi, how is your project going?”

“Well, since you are asking, I have run into a slight problem concerning some of the younglings,” Obi-Wan said nonchalantly as he sat down next to Hondo grabbing a stein.

“Oh? What have the little devils done now?”

Obi-Wan recounted the story to Hondo about the whole interaction with Tex Ey and her posse, he may have exaggerated a few small details about the encounter for entertainment’s sake.

“And now they are willing to make a deal with me,” Obi-Wan chuckled.

“And what is the deal, Kenobi?”

“I find them some sweets, and they stay off the boxes while I move them. It’s a very reasonable deal Hondo, I believe we should accept their deal.”

“Why don’t you just let them climb on the boxes and forget about them? They were fine before you started meddling and will be fine if you stop.”

Sighing Obi-Wan shook his head, “Hondo, they are children. They shouldn’t be running around unsupervised it’s dangerous. Adults have a responsibility to children to protect them and teach them what’s right and wrong. If no one else is going to step up I’m going to.”

Hondo threw up his arms, “Kenobi, let’s make a deal. You keep those little miscreants out of our way and I’ll supply all the sweets those little heathens want.”

Obi-Wan was not impressed by the deal presented to him by the pirate. Mainly because it was what he already planned on doing, to begin with, but he wasn’t going to argue over this matter.

“You have yourself a deal, Hondo,” Obi-Wan took Hondo’s hand and shook it.

“Jydo! Come show Kenobi where the sweets are.”

Looking up Obi-Wan watched as a male Weequay cautiously shuffled over to them. He ducked in between drunken pirates with such grace only a completely sober person could possess. In Obi-Wan’s opinion, it was odd to see a completely sober pirate but it was nice to see another sober adult on board.

“You said to show them the sweets, sir?” Jydo questioned Hondo, not really believing what he had heard.

“Yes, the sweets. So the little heathens stay away!”

“Yes sir,” he turned to Obi-Wan and motioned for him to follow, “Right this way, sir.”

He led Obi-Wan past the rest of the crew and down a dusty hallway. As they walked, Jydo cast quick glances when he believed the Jedi would not notice. Jydo had seen Obi-Wan from a distance anytime the Jedi did secret deals with Hondo. Back then he looked untouchable; now he seemed like a faded version of the idol he was during the war. Someone might only see the hollowed-out shell of a man only looking at the outer layer of Kenobi, under that though someone can see this man isn’t defeated yet, he has a purpose only he knows.

“You do not act like the others on board, Jydo. Why is that?” Obi-Wan asked Jydo as they walked.

“Uh… Well, I tend to stay behind during the risky missions because I do not approve of violence. I manage the money and keep inventory most of the time.”

“Why did you join Hondo if you do not approve of violence?”

“It was either that or be a slave for the rest of my life. So I chose my freedom. It wasn’t that big of a decision as you would think.”

They stopped near the end of the hallway in front of one of the many identical doors. The only thing making the door different from the others was the inscription so faded it was unreadable. Jydo swiftly opened the door and shuffled into the dark room, Obi-Wan followed suit. A few paces into the room the overhead lights flickered on illuminating a large apartment meant for a family. A thick layer of dust coated every surface, proving this section of the ship hasn’t been used in a long time. Even with the dust, the room was nicer than the cupboard Hondo had given Obi-Wan to stay in with the twins.

Jydo opened the top right cupboard in the small kitchenette and pulled a box of what looked like sparcklemint sticks. 

As Jydo handed Obi-Wan the box he told “Sorry, these are the only sweets we have on board.”

“This is fine Jydo,” Obi-Wan smiled, “Say why isn’t this part of the ship used? This is a very nice apartment.”

“It’s haunted,” Jydo shrugged and walked out of the apartment as if they were talking about the weather.

“You’re just going to say that with a straight face and walk away?”

“Well, the others believe this section is haunted. I believe we had a stow away pretending to be a ghost when we first started our lives of piracy.”

“What lead to that conclusion?”

“Everything stopped after we dropped off some goods on Tatooine, but no one believes me so they still avoid this section of the ship.”

And with that information in mind, Obi-Wan started to hatch a plan on how he could obtain the apartment for the twins and himself.

“What took ya so long?!” Tex cried out as Obi-Wan and Jydo entered the cargo bay.

Obi-Wan knew the best way to respond was with a story, “Well young one, we had to travel into the  _ haunted _ part of the ship to acquired these sweets for you. It was a  _ very _ dangerous trip filled with ghosts and lightsaber-wielding.”

As he walked over to the twins the rest of the younglings gaped in awe at the information given to them.

“Tell us more!” One of the younglings cried followed by the rest agreeing with them asking for more to the story.

Obi-Wan leaned over and set the box of sweets on the floor. He picked up Leia and started to rock her. Right before he could start to tell the younglings anything, an alarm started to blare overhead.

“Kriff,” Jydo sighed.

“Well that’s a new sound,” Obi-Wan hummed.

“That would be the ‘everyone get ready to board someone’ alarm.”

“Mmm, what should I do?”

“Stay here and keep the children out of the way.”

The door closed with a quiet swish behind Jydo leaving Obi-Wan and the younglings alone in the soon to be creche.

“I wanna see what they’re doin’,” Tex grinned, which was so similar to Hondo’s Obi-Wan had to wonder if Tex was Hondo’s child.


	4. Chapter 4

“Tex, sweetheart, I do not believe that is such a good idea,” Obi-Wan told the young girl.

“Well, what would you have us do instead? Sit here and do nothing?”

The sass radiating from this child was so strong you couldn’t even penetrate it with the Force’s help. Obi-Wan was so proud.

Clapping his hands together Obi-Wan chimed, “How about I tell you about my time in the haunted part of the ship?”

That distracted all the children from the fight going on behind the closed doors.

“Tell us!” they all screamed.

They tugged on his sleeves as they dragged him onto the ground. He sat Leia on his lap and started to reach for Luke when a youngling, who seemed to be part Twi’Lek and part Weequay, picked Luke up and settled him in his lap.

“Why thank you… I don’t believe I caught your name,” Obi-Wan hummed.

“Chee. My name’s Chee Tar,” he said as Luke tried to grab his leathery blue and brown Leku.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you Chee. Thank you for helping with Luke.”

“Now that that's over… Get on with the story!” Tex exclaimed.

“Okay, okay. Stay calm and sit down young one,” Obi-Wan laughed, “After we made our deal about the sweets I went to Hondo-”

“Captain Hondo is amazing!” Tex interrupted, and the other younglings agreed with them.

“As I was saying, he told me that the crew doesn’t eat a lot of sweets and the only person who would know was Jydo. Jydo lead me to the haunted part of the ship and that is when we ran into trouble

“As we walked the vents started to rattle and shake and fog leaked into the hall as a loud moan echoed off the walls. I drew my lightsaber and the blue glow filled the dark hall with light. The moan intensified and grew closer but we couldn’t see anything, I could only feel the presence in the Force.  _ Woosh! _ We were thrown into a wall by the presence, our backs hit the wall with a loud bang!” He clapped his hands loudly, startling the younglings.

“Then what happened?” Chee asked as he pulled Luke closer to him.

“I lifted my saber high in the air and used the Force to sense the presence. It was right next to Jydo!”

“No! Not Jydo! He’s too nice to be hurt!” One of the younglings cried as the rest nodded in agreement.

Obi-Wan had to smile at the younglings’ concern for Jydo.

“I slashed my saber at the presence, but nothing happened! For a minute I didn’t know what to do. I stood in shock wondering why my lightsaber did nothing! Then I noticed the presence wasn’t interested in me. They just wanted Jydo! I stepped in front of him and they stopped! It was as if my Force presence calmed it or that my force sensitivity hid Jydo.”

“Really?” A gruff voice asked from behind him.

Obi-Wan had been so focused on the younglings he had failed to notice Hondo and his crew enter the cargo bay. They stood in the doorway, looks of awe on their faces.

Hondo looked at Jydo, “Is Kenobi’s story true?”

Jydo looked at Obi-Wan and held his gaze for a second or two, then said, “Oh, Kenobi’s hasn’t even finished the story. The ghost seemed to like him. Didn’t you say it seemed to pat you on the head?”

Obi-Wan nodded, “Yeah, it did.”

“I honestly believe he might be the only adult on the ship that could walk freely down the  _ cursed hall _ . It really could be a Jedi thing.”

Ooh’s and awe’s ran through the crew. All of them seemed impressed that the Jedi and ghost could get along.

“Well finish the story!” the younglings yelled.

Chuckling, Obi-Wan bounced Leia, “Alright, alright. Where was I? Oh, yes, I was standing in front of Jydo with my lightsaber. I could feel the presence approach us, but with less anger and hatred it seemed to hold before. Once it was right in front of me it seemed to pet my hair, as Jydo said earlier. With those few pats, it vanished without a trace! I couldn’t find it anywhere!”

Chee pulled Luke tighter to his chest, “Where did it go?”

“That’s the thing young one. I don’t know where they went! They could be anywhere on the ship for all we know.” 

It was hard for Obi-Wan to keep a straight face as everyone started to wildly look around for the ghost, “Although I believe it likes that part of the ship so they’ll most likely stay there. And they seem to like force sensitive people.”

“Oh look at the time! I think it’s time for the younglings to head to bed!” Jydo clapped his hands to get their attention.

Jydo ushered the younglings out of the cargo bay, making Chee leave Luke in the baby hammock. Tex hugged Obi-Wan before they ran ahead of everyone.

Once they left Hondo and Obi-Wan were the only ones left except for the twins, Obi-Wan turned to Hondo smiling, “You know the apartment the candy was in was very nice.”

“Really? I haven’t been in that part of the ship in years.” Hondo smiled.

“Well, since the  _ ghost _ likes force sensitives I believe the twins and I shall be moving into that apartment.” 

“Kenobi! You would put two adorable little children in that kind of danger?”

“They’re force sensitive Hondo,” Obi-Wan laughed as he picked up the twins and walked out of the cargo bay.

Jydo stood outside the cargo bay door smothering his laughter in his leathery hand. He smiled at Obi-Wan, silently taking Leia from Obi-Wan walking with him. They walked side-by-side in silence until they reached the haunted part of the ship.

“So you’re just going to move in with a ghost, Kenobi?” Jydo snickered.

Smirking Obi-Wan readjusted Luke in his arms. “Well, they seemed to like me.”

“You just fooled the whole entire crew into believing the  _ ghost  _ only likes force sensitives! And that you would be needed to enter this part of the ship. It’s great!”


End file.
